About running
For a long time I hated running. I hated when I had to push my limits. I hated it for feeling being lousy at some thing. I also hated the feeling when adrenaline makes your blood run around your wains. The feeling of the adrenaline rush reminded me too closely the physical feeling of fear. I hated it so much, I started to cry, so that people would leave me alone and not ask me to do more. I hated it so much, that I got asthma and hyperventilation and bad knees. Ok, the asthma and bad knees were always there coming, but I also took them as my favorite excuses. But sometimes I ran. It was one way to beat myself. When I had really high self loath, I went for running, so I could run the bad feeling away. And it helped. The exercise made my body feel better and I felt better when I could, by running ,punish myself for being so lousy person. I ran so far and so fast I could until the asthma kicked in. Which wasn’t too far, few hundred meters max. ...